Saturday, December 05, 2009

Never give up!

I came upon this poem about perseverance and I think that every target should read this and think about it:

When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but do not quit.
Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit-
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit."

As a target parent and from talking with other target parents, I understand the feeling of wanting to quit. You want to throw your hands up, wave the white surrender flag, snap your fingers and have the time turn back to when things were normal with your children. You are tired, exhausted emotionally, strained physically and financially ruined. You have spent so much time, energy and money and you are no closer to your children. You may think that waiting until they are older and they have some maturity that perhaps they will seek you out. This can and does happen sometimes, but are you willing to gamble with this idea?

I understand that it is difficult to continue to extend the hand of communication and contact when all you get in return is hatred. Everyone wants some positive reinforcement for their efforts. I understand the thought of "why bother". Your children are depending upon you to be there and I understand that they may not be demonstrating that. In fact they are resisting your efforts and doing everything they can to push you away. I do believe that deep down, they do not want you to push away.

I suggest that if you have not read this book, that you read it. I think you will gain a new perspective and hope on your situation. You can click the link and it will take you to where you can purchase this book.

Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome: Breaking the Ties That Bind (Norton Professional Book)

Never give up! I would like to share some quotes with you and I hope that they make a difference.

"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."
~ Dale Carnegie

"It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get up."
~ Vince Lombardi

"Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal. My strength lies solely in my tenacity. "
~ Louis Pasteur

"When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."
~ Thomas Jefferson

"Never give up on something that you can't go a day without thinking about."
~ Unknown

Parental Alienation is Abuse! Stop the abuse!


  1. Hi,
    I want to first thank you for this blog and after reading your quotes on "never give up", felt this might be a good place to start with the situation we are in. I have been extremely busy fighting another issue with my family that I wasn't able to see what was happening in my fiance's family, until I became her target I had no idea. After a small amount of research on PAS it was easy what was going on and why he and his adult kids are not close. After even more research we find much to his shock that to our belief the alienation started at while the kids were very little. Especially after looking over their psychologicals together begining with one son in the 2nd grade. My fiance is a retired plant manager and worked most of the time and has traveled all over the world. He did'nt see it. I couldnt see how he could be so blind until I realized that she had him under her control as well..he waited until all kids were grown then filed for a divorce. Still after 10 years she is alienating their grown children against him and now I am the alienator because she has them believeing that I am keeping them and their father apart. I was very close to one son but now, they all 3 feel the same way. This could go on forever! I have also found out that she is the one that caused my own grown so to be so angry with me that he cut off contact to me with my grandboys while she calls and tells people that she has two new grandbabies and they finaLLY HAVE A REAL GRANDMOTHER. My son is coming around and this is good but will surely make her more mad....we need advice. My fiance wants to be close to his sons and I want her out of our lives.
    Thank you

  2. Look at this: Dr. Bricklin’s and Dr. Elliot’s most famous book, PSYCHOLOGISTS' CHILD CUSTODY STRATEGIES

    I knew some Attorneys would try to have their client use alienation so that they would prevail but these two people are actually seeling Parental Alienation Stratagies

    One for the Male Parent and one for the Female...which I bet are even the same!

  3. This is so spooky, my mother gave me this poem back in 1993, and it gave me strength, it works, don't ever give up.